Giampetro, Anthony D

You know my method. It is founded upon the observation of trifles. Mediocrity knows nothing higher than itself; but talent instantly recognizes genius. My name is Sherlock Holmes. It is my business to know what other people don’t know. I am the most incurably lazy devil that ever stood in shoe leather The world is full of obvious things which nobody by any chance ever observes. I have always held, too, that pistol practice should be distinctly an open-air pastime; and when Holmes, in one of his queer humours, would sit in an armchair with his hair-trigger and a hundred Boxer cartridges and proceed to adorn the opposite wall with a patriotic V.R. done in bullet pocks, I felt strongly that neither the atmosphere nor the appearance of our room was improved by it. I must apologize for calling so late, and I must further beg you to be so unconventional as to allow me to leave your house presently by scrambling over your back garden wall. You see, but you do not observe. The distinction is clear. Come, Watson, come! The game is afoot. Not a word! Into your clothes and come!
Marry me. There’s only one man I’ve ever called a coward, and that’s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I’m calling you is a television actor. Now, when you do this without getting punched in the chest, you’ll have more fun. I’m afraid I just blue myself. No! I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you. I don’t understand the question, and I won’t respond to it.

I have always held, too, that pistol practice should be distinctly an open-air pastime; and when Holmes, in one of his queer humours, would sit in an armchair with his hair-trigger and a hundred Boxer cartridges and proceed to adorn the opposite wall with a patriotic V.R. done in bullet pocks, I felt strongly that neither the atmosphere nor the appearance of our room was improved by it. The world is full of obvious things which nobody by any chance ever observes. I must apologize for calling so late, and I must further beg you to be so unconventional as to allow me to leave your house presently by scrambling over your back garden wall. Is there any point to which you would wish to draw my attention? To the curious incident of the dog in the night-time. The dog did nothing in the night-time. That was the curious incident Man, or at least criminal man, has lost all enterprise and originality. As to my own little practice, it seems to be degenerating into an agency for recovering lost lead pencils and giving advice to young ladies from boarding-schools. Mediocrity knows nothing higher than itself; but talent instantly recognizes genius. You will not apply my precept. How often have I said to you that when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth? We know that he did not come through the door, the window, or the chimney. We also know that he could not have been concealed in the room, as there is no concealment possible. When, then, did he come?

Just get us on the ground! That part will happen pretty definitely! Man walks down the street in a hat like that, you know he’s not afraid of anything. Jayne, your mouth is talking. You might wanna look to that. Oh, I think you might wanna reconsider that last part. See, I married me a powerful ugly creature. You know what the chain of command is? It’s the chain I go get and beat you with until you understand who’s in ruttin charge here. I swear by my pretty floral bonnet, I will end you. Also? I can kill you with my brain. Psychic, though? That sounds like something out of science fiction. We live in a spaceship, dear.